Kig-Yar
Jackholes, colloqually known as Jackals,F***ing ugly Jackasses, dinner and sometimes lunch and sometimes breakfast (in Sgt. Johnson's case) and sometimes Y are exactly what their name says; Jack All. They are a skinny race of weird yellow space-chickens. They don't seem to eat much of what the Covenant call "food", and so they remain anorexic because they didn't bring their own preferred foods (Or lunchboxes). They use sniper rifles because they are cowards, but use other guns that they can never hit anything with. Jackals have large blue discs strapped to their arms, which they use as protective shields and in rare cases as condoms. However, this is not their primary function. The discs are actually miniature communications dishes that are used to exercise mind-control on Grunts. The rays emitted by the discs stop the Gruntiness affecting the Grunts, and thus stops them from rebelling. Like the other Covenant species the Jackals have to take a dip in the Butter couldron before battle so sticky grenades won't stick to them. Jackals originate for the planet Eayn, commonly referred to as the jackhole of the galaxy. Jackals were accepted into the covenant because the Profit of Truth lost a bet . Apparently, Truth cannot hold his liquor. Jackholes evolved from a subspecies of turkey that decided that they needed a better purpose in life.Jackholes seem to have a great fear of thanksgiving due to thier brilliant taste when cooked and their connection with turkeys. A little known fact is that the Jackholes homeworld is a bunch of party-goers. Hence the fact that they all wear mohawks. The Covenant found out becuase a bunch of Elites needed some down time and wanted to hit up a party planet. After accidently driving High Charity through half the planet, the remaining Jackals were drafted into the military. Originally intended as rations when described as "turkey-like semi-sentient objects", their purpose was changed to meatshields when the prophet was notified that they had tried that and it hadn't gone over well. The prophet then shot the dumb bitch who tried to inform him that would not work either, later he was quoted as saying on the matter "Yes. Perfect. Everything is going according to plan." Their "Rave Discs" found a secondary use as a sheild, and their leather outfit was used as their combat suit. Jackholes are the first reported Turkey Dancers, and until we find half of a planet that smells like poultry, we will never know. Also, Jackholes are snipers becuase of their large eyes, which is due to being in dark places full of mad rave discs. They have no intelligle language, becuase honestly, theirs onyl two terms party-goers need. "Pass me that beer," and "Dude, get me some nachos." Reproduction Jackals have no sex organs, so they vomit sperm into the female jackal's mouth, then she pretends to act glad. Then 2 minutes later, a miracle happens! Baby is born! Known Jackals: *Charlie Dickson *Superman * Frodo *Soulja Boy *Anoobis(lord of the n00bs) *Yayap, honorary Jackal *Optimis prime *Britney Spears *Sarah Palin *Devon Milford *Charlie Brown *Dina1 *Ashely from RE4 There were never any famous jackals since nobody wanted to pay attention to an under-fed turkey with jaundice. The most effective weapons against them are rocks, scizzors, a Turkey baster, a facefull of buckshot, or Thanksgiving Day. Image:Turkey Hunting.jpg|Proper way to hunt and dispose of turkeys. Note how he is in extreme pain, begging to be eaten for Thanksgiving. Image:Clip_image004.jpg|Turkeys have also been known to pull off Matrix moves Image:Jackal Plasma.jpg|If provoked, turkeys may release energy attacks, which are also mastered by Spartans [[Link title[[Link title]]]]